Thursday, December 23, 2010

Profile: Jack Swindle, Editor of Profiles in Batshit

Undiagnosed Manic Depressive for thirty-four years. Rage. Broken furniture. Most relationships resemble a slow plane crash.

Depressive episodes manifested by panicky social anxiety and periods of rampant, often irresponsible activity. Colossal drinking habit. Hundreds of unfinished projects. Hypertension. Sensitivity to bright light. Grandfather: self-taught engineer who once removed all of the furniture from the house, claiming it had been injected with radioactive material.

Alienates those closest to him with fits of self-deprecation and violence toward inanimate objects. His personality dominates the mood and tenor of his interactions with others. Unwittingly selfish, abusive with language. Intelligent (and conniving) enough to convince himself he has self-control. Frightens those he loves the most, including the dog. Once punched, during a manic/drunken episode, by a guy previously thought confined to a wheelchair.

Hundreds of pages of unpublishable prose. Feels crushed by inspiration. Ambitious yet usually incapable of calming down enough to get anything done. Has done a lot of drugs. Loves stories, women, words, and himself.

During a recent depressive period, fancied himself the culmination of all humanity—while standing on a bridge. Describes self in third person to abnegate responsibility. For years suspected something was really, really wrong but refused to do anything about it, letting others feel the brunt of his expressions. Believes himself to be lonely even when surrounded by friends and lovers. Financially profligate.

Tried yoga, meditation and sobriety to control his moods. Turned to anti-depressants, thus exacerbating his hypomania. Often blames abstract forces for his troubles. Has a breakdown at a pop concert. Goes on low-grade antipsychotics. Finds himself impressed and confused by stability. Figures he should start a journal about it.

Diagnosis:  Bipolar II, Egomaniac, Psoriatic, Batshit

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